In response to the previous post I did earlier on the Huffington Post findings that women are, in general, feeling less happy in the modern climate - here is a follow up.  Author, Marcus Buckingham (funny, how the expert-news-reporter-on-women’s-happiness is male), has backed up his previous publication now with the prescription for female happiness.  Although the “research” done I don’t have any particular beef with, I’m still skeptical on exactly how the research was performed - how many women were interviewed, and of that, how many were truthful.

Happiness is a very funny thing - both in its simplicity and importance.  Can we really define what it means to be happy?  Is it a feeling of lightness, free from worry, free from pain, essentially: free from emotion?  Or is it more a general acceptance for all of our emotions, the freedom to experience and truly feel the continuum?  Think about it.  What does happiness mean to you?

Martha Washington stated: “The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our disposition and not on our circumstances.”  In other words, simply change your horrible feelings into better feelings, think more positive thoughts.  This is all well and good, but not as easy as it may sound.  So much of our experiences are not only emotionally and mentally
felt, but somatically stored in the body.  Our reactions to stimuli become automatic reflexes, learned habits.  In order to truly change our disposition, we must be willing to work with ourselves on the physical, emotional, and mental levels.  This takes time, energy, and like anything in life that takes a lot of training to accomplish - a significant amount of discomfort.

As a society, in general, we do not embrace discomfort very well.  Why should we? -when there are all sorts of pills and substances out there to numb that discomfort.  Perhaps if the readily available goods to take the edge off physical and emotional pain developed over the past few decades were as truly beneficial as they claim, there wouldn’t be articles and studies showing the significant decline in general happiness.  Perhaps, we are missing the mark by not encouraging the understanding of our
discomfort by throwing a nice comfy blanket around it.

I was at a concert last night in the East Village, and next to the bar was a sign written in chalk saying: “Beer makes us feel how we should feel without drinking beer.”  How very insightful and astute for a punk-rock bar.  The unfortunate part to the prior statement is that by drinking beer (or taking meds, or whatever) to feel a happier self, we often take two steps back when that high runs out.  It’s not a means to an end, there is not an easy and fun short-cut.  If we want the good stuff, we have to do
the work - but isn’t that a part of being alive?

For this, and many other reasons, alternative healing methods are growing in popularity and excitement.  People are seeing the long-term results of taking away their symptoms, essentially stripping them of their experiences, and want to take their power back.  Please be advised that I am not shrugging off the importance of certain medications, which are vital to healthcare.
What I am suggesting is a melding of the two, empowering people to take their experiences and health into the power of their own body.  If you are not experience a level of happiness that you deem appropriate, I encourage you to ask yourself why this may be the case and what possible things can be done to help the situation?  Martha Washington was right, changing out circumstances is not the key - its changing ourselves.

We were not born to be sick, we were born to be healthy.  It is what our bodies do.  Sometimes we get off track and we need a light push, sometimes before the push we need a kick-in-the-teeth and some help for the pain.  Ultimately, if we can marry the therapeutic treatments available, I firmly believe we can do a greater good.

Check out the newest Huffington Post article, please leave comments if you have any:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/what-the-happiest-and-mos_b_301406.html
In happiness for all,
Erin